Abiit Nemine Salutato
by No Fate 1990
Summary: Abiit Nemine Salutato means He went away without bidding anyone farewell. This story serves as a sequel to my story called "Violated". In this story, Mary struggles to move forward after her son Gabriel's death. His memory and ghost continues to haunt her.
1. To Save But Still Lose A Life

Mary's p.o.v

Violated stolen innocence, injustice. Rape, godless wretched deliverance. Indescribable pain, needless aftershock. New black and blue scars, oceans of tears and unpleasant memories, constant fear. Emptiness plus nothingness and numbness equals incomplete wholeness. Nightly tremors, no apologies, ever-present roadblocks. Carried away on broken wings, endless silent torture and resilience.

Mary's p.o.v

Severe morning sickness cripples me. I use multiple chamber pots. I conclude from my missed period and continuous nausea that I am pregnant. I am stuck at a crossroads. I want to keep the baby, but I don't know want to wear the scarlet letter for the rest of my life. My unexpected confinement worries people especially Francis. The pregnancy remains my secret until Francis enters my chamber demanding for answers. "I am pregnant" I confess crying into my beloved's arms. Those three words changes everything for us and the kingdom.

Mary's p.o.v

Humid, the heat increases my nausea. I feel a fainting spell coming on. Nobody except for Francis knows that I am pregnant. He carries me to our bedroom. Our sudden departure from the joust stirs up controversy. A doctor, hired by Catherine, reconfirms my pregnancy. The news puts me in an unfavorable light.

Mary's p.o.v

"You are pregnant with a rapist's baby!" Catherine reminds me. The doctor has just told her about my pregnancy. I bet Catherine's yelling can be heard by people outside my bedroom. "I already knew I was pregnant. I shared the news with Francis" I notify her. Catherine is so livid that she stomps her feet. "Make your wife have an abortion" she orders Francis. "It's Mary's body and choice" Francis argues. "You can't have this baby. It will be bad for the kingdom. I have a friend who performs abortions" Catherine pressures me. "I will not kill an innocent life in order to satisfy you" hysterical, I shout. Francis sees I am about to cry and kicks his mom out of the room. Finally alone with my husband, I break down into tears. A part of myself thinks Catherine is right.

* * *

Time Period: An Alternate Universe-What if Mary did have an abortion?

Mary's p.o.v

At times especially right now when I am broken, I seek refuge at church. "Father, please forgive me for what I am about to do" I cry out to the Lord. I am referring to my upcoming scheduled abortion. One of Catherine's friends who is a physician will perform the procedure. Lola, Francis, and Catherine have promised to offer comfort and support for me. "The physician is here" Francis informs me. Holding my hand, he accompanies me to an isolated private bedchamber where the death angel resides. Deep pain and sorrow cripples me. Although I have committed a terrible sin, I am at no fault here.

* * *

Mary's p.o.v

Food poisoning hits me during what was supposed to be a lovely meal with Francis and his family. My hand falls to my belly where a growing fetus resides. Fetal distress takes a huge toll on me. I feel blood and pressure down below. I try to hold back my vomit and keep my composure. "Mary, you look unwell. What is the matter?" concerned, Francis asks squeezing my hand. "I have been poisoned" coughing, I reveal. Francis and Bash go into full-blown panic and protective mode. Catherine, Charles, and Claude are hesitant to help. While I rest and recover in my bedroom, the suspect who is a chef is captured and executed. I assume he wanted kill my baby in which he almost did.

Francis' p.o.v

Ominous misfortune, obvious oblivious big elephant in the room. When things go kaboom during the midnight hour, it is a bittersweet hallelujah. Even in her delicate pregnant state, she is an ant wandering about a desolate place. Once full of grace, her face displays fear now. Like snowflakes falling from the sky, love and companionship passes her by. Ominous misfortune, signs of a possible premature labor and demise startles her.

Mary's p.o.v

Contractions seize my body as I enter the throne room. "Ouch" I moan bending over in pain. The contractions have been off and on all day. Francis helps me onto my throne. Something is wrong, but I can't dwell on it right now. We are expecting a very important guest. Our very important guest turns out to be Nostradamus. He begins and ends our conversation with these haunting prophetic words, "sometimes a lion becomes a lamb. Sometimes a rose becomes a thorn in your side."

Mary's p.o.v

Clutching my stomach, I lean on the bed post for support. I inhale and exhale a few deep breaths. "Not now" I beg my unborn child who longs to embrace the outside world. I am only six months pregnant. Premature labor has been a big growing fear of mine. If born right now, my son or daughter wouldn't survive. "Mary, I can cancel the party if you are feeling unwell" Francis offers. Another contraction seizes my body before I can respond to him. "Francis" I gasp bending over in pain. Francis lays me down on the bed. I feel safe in his warm strong arms. I recover quickly all thanks to him. I am well enough to attend the ball with him.

Time Period: The Premature labor and Birth

Mary's flashback

"How are you feeling?" concerned, Francis asks while we dance before our friends and family. My pregnancy is the reason for the special occasion. "I am fine. Our dancing hasn't impacted the baby "I assure him. "You need to rest. We can't afford another miscarriage" he stresses. His words reopens an old wound, a very sensitive subject that I tried to avoid. Tears crawl from underneath the rocky surface. Francis' soothing touch comforts me for a little bit. Suddenly, sharp pains hits my abdominal area. Francis is kind enough to escort me to my seat. Most people including Francis assume that I am tired of dancing. I must say their assumptions are false. Silently, I exit the ballroom in order to avoid their suspicion. The contractions hit me with full force once as I lay down on my warm bed. Bloody raindrops trickle down my thighs and legs. The urge to push is unbearable. Loud horrifying screams escape from my mouth. My cries for help bring much needed and yet unwanted visitors into the bedchamber. In great agony, I deliver a son whose name is Gabriel. Uncontrollably, my heart bleeds with love for him.

Scenario: Mary's near death experience, Gabe's premature birth

Mary's p.o.v

"My body is tensed. If the baby has been born then why I am still experiencing contractions?" I mention to the attending doctor. "You must deliver the placenta. You will bleed to death if it stays inside you" he forewarns me. I fail to push the placenta out. The doctor shakes his head in concern. My son was born prematurely and now here I am fighting to stay alive once again. I'm not afraid to die, but I choose life. Gently, Francis presses down on my stomach. The placenta comes out and I stop screaming at last.

Time Period: The Present Reality

Scenario: After Francis' death, James is crowned the new King. Mary helps a depressed and

suicidal Gabriel.

Mary's p.o.v

Francis' death and James' coronation drove Gabe over the edge. He didn't have any claim to the throne because he was a bastard. I received a bad vibe from him during James's coronation. He gave me this "I am going to kill myself" kind of look. I was in denial about his condition until Anna, Lola, John, and Bash reopened my eyes. I followed Gabriel to his favorite hiding place in which was located in the woods. I caught Gabe in the act of pulling the trigger. I grabbed the gun from him. Tears and hugs replaced the thoughts that he couldn't put into words.

Time Period: A Flashback

Mary's p.o.v

Strangely, Gabriel didn't attend court today. Both Lola and Anna said Gabriel didn't want to be a part of my inner circle anymore. I assumed he was in a depressed mood again. Greatly concerned, I visited his little cottage in the woods. Grumpy, Gabriel moped around the place. I overlooked the pain in his eyes. "Gabe, you don't have any claim to the throne. I thought a high position at court would satisfy you. I need and want you there" I stressed. "I don't need your sympathy. Leave me alone! Let me live my life!" Gabe demanded throwing a pillow at me. This sentence, "I am your mother and queen. You must obey me" meant nothing to him.

Time Period: The Present Reality

Place: The Royal Garden

Mary's p.o.v

"Are you sure Gabriel committed suicide?" I ask Bash in the garden one lovely Sunday evening. I know the answer, but I am afraid to accept the truth. I am stuck in the denial stage of the grieving process. "Nobody murdered Gabriel. Your son killed himself" Bash reconfirms. Ironically, I discover Gabriel's rifle laying in a pile of lilies. I freeze remembering that horrible night when I lost my son. Bash unloads the gun before I can use it on myself.


	2. Its Too Quiet & Weird Here Without You

Mary's p.o.v

My heart and world were your home.

Its too quiet and weird here without you.

Nobody says your name because they

believe you don't deserve honor.


	3. Tears on my wooden cross

Place: A Chapel

Mary's p.o.v

Grief engulfs me as I approach the Lord's altar. I lite a candle in Gabriel's honor. There is something

special and unforgettable about feeling the Holy Spirit move.


	4. The Day You Slipped Away

I remember it clearly the day you slipped away -Avril Lavigne, Slipped Away

Time Period: A Flashback

Situation: The day and night of Gabriel's Death

Mary's p.o.v

Earlier in the day, I made an unexpected visit to Gabriel's little cottage in the woods. I wanted to

know why he didn't attend court. My guards and I caught Gabe beating himself with a belt. I

snatched the belt from his hands. He reached for a rifle that rested underneath his pillow. I also

took that gun away from him. He wasn't going to hurt or kill himself on my watch. For his personal

safety, my guards arrested him. They took him to prison. I didn't care if Gabriel was livid or having

a temper tantrum. Eventually, he gave into me. He was in solitary confinement until I felt he was

stable. I released him early from jail for having good behavior. He promised to never hurt himself

again. Besides having good behavior, he had a ball to attend with me. Selfish, James cut into our

slow dance. Gabriel's depression resurfaced right there and then. I overlooked the pain and

sorrow in his pretty brown eyes. He disappeared into the shadows of my mind.


	5. A Daily Constant Absence

Mary's p.o.v

A daily constant absence

Your afterglow

Even now it is a mere memory


	6. In My Absence, You'll Find Truth or Hope

Gabriel's p.o.v

My life was one entire big swansong.

I disappeared along with the sunset.

I bet you were happy to be rid of me.

In my absence, you'll find truth or hope.


	7. The Permanently Silenced Voice

Mary's p.o.v

Sleeping peacefully in heavenly bliss

The permanently silenced voice

Your blueprints

Lingering ashes and reminders of yesterday


	8. What He Left Behind For Me To Discover

Mary's p.o.v

I remember his last hug

and goodbye wave.

He took his pain and sorrow

with him to the grave. A

dead body is what he left

behind for me to discover.


	9. Lost Without You

I think I'm lost without you, you -Freya Ridings, Lost Without You

Time Period: A flashback before Gabe's suicide

Mary's p.o.v

He stood up in the middle of dinner. "I am going to kill myself" he announced. His voice got lost

in the sea of chatter. Nobody paid any attention to him. I could barely hear him.


	10. If Only I Understood His Final Goodbye

Mary's p.o.v

He walked off the scene

and I felt sure he was

coming back to talk more.

Later on he knocked on heaven's

door and a gunshot was heard around

the world. Who knew he was broken


End file.
